A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told that the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature pilotless technology: It is an uncrewed aircraft. Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company's software is running the aircraft's automatic pilot system. Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the
aircraft, each offering a different type of excuse.
One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed. Asked why he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight, he replies : "If it is the same software that runs my company's IT systems, this plane won't even take off." !!!!
That is called Confidence!!!
Hiccups happen when the diaphragm, the muscle that controls our breathing, becomes irritated and start to spasm and contract uncontrollably. With each contraction, air is pulled into the lungs very quickly, passes through the voice box, and then the epiglottis closes behind the rush of air, shaking the vocal chords, causing the "hic" sound.
The irritation can be caused by rapid eating, emotional stress and even some diseases. The best cure?Breathing into a paper bag. This calms the diaphragm by increasing the
amount of carbon dioxide in your bloodstream.
The length from your wrist to your elbow is the same as the length of your foot.
Your heart beats 101,000 times a day. During your lifetime it will beat about 3 billion times and pump about 400 million litres (800 million pints) of blood.
Your mouth produces 1 litre (1.8 pints) of saliva a day.
On average, people can hold their breath for one minute. The world record is seven-and-a-half minutes.
On average, you breathe 23,000 times a day.
On average, you speak almost 5,000 words a day - although almost 80% of speaking is self-talk (talking to yourself).
Einstein's brain was of average size (1375 grams - 49oz).
Over the last 150 years the average height of people in industrialized nations increased by 10 cm (4 in).
In the 19th century, American men were the tallest in the world, averaging 1,71m (5'6"). Today, the average height for American men is 1,75m (5'7"), compared to 1,77m (5'8") for Swedes, and 1,78m (5'8.5") for the Dutch.
The tallest nation in the world is the Watusis of Burundi.
If the amount of water in your body is reduced by just 1%, you'll feel thirsty.
Hippocrates, the Father of Medicine, suggested that a woman could enlarge her bust line by singing loudly and often.
A person can live without food for about a month, but only about a week without water.You'll drink about 75,000 litres (20,000 gallons) of water in your lifetime.
After a certain period of growth, hair becomes dormant. That means that it is attached to the hair follicle until replaced by new hair.
Hair on the head grows for between two and six years before being replaced.
In the case of baldness, the dormant hair was not replaced with new hair.
Men loose about 40 hairs a day. Women loose about 70 hairs a day.
In the Middle Ages the length from the tip of the middle finger to the elbow was called an ell.
A person remains conscious for eight seconds after being decapitated.
The first human sex change took place in 1950 when Danish doctor Christian Hamburger operated on New Yorker George Jargensen, who became Christine Jargensen.
The muscle that lets your eye blink is the fastest muscle in your body. It allows you to blink 5 times a second. On average, you blink 15 000 times a day. Women blink twice as much as men.
A typical athlete's heart churns out 25 to 30 litres (up to 8 gallons) of blood per minute.
Unless food is mixed with saliva you cannot taste it.
The liver is the largest of the body's internal organs. The skin is the body's largest organ.
Not all our taste buds are on our tongue; about 10% are on the palette and the cheeks.
On average a hiccup lasts 5 minutes.
Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails.
It takes about 3 months for the transplanted hair to start growing again.
About 13% of people are left-handed. Up from 11% in the past.
In 1900, a person could expect to live to be 47. Today, the average life expectancy for men and women in developed countries is longer than 70 years.
A newborn baby's head accounts for one-quarter of its weight.
King Henry I, who ruled in the England in the 12th century, standardised the yard as the distance from the thumb of his outstretched arm to his nose.
The bones in your body are not white - they range in colour from beige to light brown. The bones you see in museums are white because they have been boiled and cleaned.
Our eyes are always the same size from birth.
Every person has a unique tongue print.
If all your DNA is stretched out, it would reach to the moon 6,000 times.
Approximately two-thirds of a person's body weight is water. Blood is 92% water. The brain is 75% water and muscles are 75% water.
The coloured part of the eye is called the iris. Behind the iris is the soft, rubbery lens which focuses the light on to a layer, called the retina, in the back of the eye. The retina contains about 125 million rods and 7 million cones. The rods pick up shades of grey and help us see in dim light. The cones work best in bright light to pick up colours.
We actually do not see with our eyes - we see with our brains. The eyes basically are the cameras of the brain. One-quarter of the brain is used to control the eyes.
Once upon a time...
There was a rich King who had 4 wives.
He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to the finest of delicacies. He gave her nothing but the best.
He also loved the 3rd wife very much and was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him for another.
He also loved his 2nd wife. She was his confidante and was always kind, considerate and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he could confide in her to help him get through the difficult times.
The King's 1st wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.
One day, the King fell ill and he knew his time was short.
He thought of his luxurious life and pondered, "I now have 4 wives with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.
Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"
"No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word.
Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.
The sad King then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?"
"No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is too good!When you die, I'm going to remarry!"
His heart sank and turned cold.
He then asked the 2nd wife, "I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?"
"I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave."
Her answer came like a bolt of thunder and the King was devastated.
Then a voice called out :
"I'll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The King looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny, she suffered from malnutrition.
Greatly grieved, the King said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"
In Truth, we all have 4 wives in our lives ....
Our 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.
Our 3rd wife is our possessions, status and wealth.When we die, it will all go to others.
Our 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
And our 1st wife is our Soul,
Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the ego.However, our Soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go.
So cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now!It is your greatest gift to offer the world !!
From the very beginning, girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy, saying that it has got to do with family background, & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.
Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrelled very often. Though the girl loved the guy deeply, she always asked him: "How deep is your love for me?" As the guy is not good with his words, this often caused the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vents her anger on him. As for him, he only endured it in silence.
After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl:
"I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?" The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he left, they got engaged. The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through
emails & phone calls. Though it was hard, but both never thought of giving up.
One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. when she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realized that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. she had lost her voice....
The doctor says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down. During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,..it's still just silence cry that accompanied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.
With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying.... The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.
With a new environment, the girl learns sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing a invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead. When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her.
He used sign language to tell her "I've spent a year to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise.Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You." With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.
Treat every relationship as if it's the last one, then you'll know how to Give. Treat every moment as is it's the last day, then you'll know how to treasure.
Treasure what you have right now, or else you will regret one day...
Some people complain that there are thorns on roses, while others praise thorns for having roses among them.
A person's true character is revealed by what he does when no one is watching.
Although the tongue weighs very little, very few people are able to hold it.
Falling down doesn't make you a failure, but staying down does.
Don't be afraid of pressure. Remember that pressure is what turns a lump of coal into a diamond.
Even a woodpecker owes his success to the fact that he uses his head.
The poorest of all men is not the man without a cent but the man without a dream.
The only preparation for tomorrow is the right use of today.
People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Temper is what gets most of us into trouble. Pride is what keeps us there.
The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little "extra".
The heart is happiest when it beats for others.
One thing you can learn by watching the clock is that it passes time by keeping its hands busy.
The fax printer is used to have a print out of the fax from the fax machine in few seconds. The different kinds of technologies are used for manufacturing cd printer to give fine-quality prints of CDs. The quality and Excellency of deskjet printers is well-accepted by all customers in the world.
1. Health enough to make work a pleasure.
2. Wealth enough to support your needs.
3. Strength enough to battle with difficulties and overcome them.
4. Grace enough to confess your sins and forsake them.
5. Patience enough to toil until some good is accomplished.
6. Charity enough to see some good in your neighbors.
7. Love enough to move you to be useful and helpful to others.
8. Faith enough to make real things of God.
9. Hope enough to remove all anxious fears concerning the future.
I was born intelligent
education ruined me.
Practice makes perfect
But nobody's perfect
so why practice?
If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?
Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.
How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard Visa.
If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.
One should love animals.
They are so tasty.
Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.
Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.
"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning
"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk
"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours
God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.
A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station.
what more can I say....
Courage is the ability to face danger, difficulty, uncertainty or pain without being paralyzed by fear.
If you're experiencing problems with getting results in regards to your money, family, agreements or questions --- stand up and speak up.
If you need help --- stand up and speak up.
If you see injustice or a need --- stand up and speak up.
If some one is taking your kindness for weakness --- stand up and speak up.
If you're feeling pressured to do something against your values or time constraints --- stand up and speak up.
If you are not clear and feeling anxious about what others are asking or expecting from you --- stand up and speak up.
If you want to turn your life around in a positive direction --- stand up and speak up.
If someone is taking advantage of your time, money, body, trust, love or friendship --- stand up and speak up.
If there is something in life you want to accomplish --- stand up and speak up.
"Gratitude is one of the sweet shortcuts to finding peace of mind and happiness inside. No matter what's going on outside of us, there's always something we could be grateful for."
HOW TRUE IT IS
Another year has passed, And we're all a little older.
Last summer felt hotter, And winter seems much colder.
I rack my brain for happy thoughts, To put down on my pad,
But lots of things, That come to mind, Just make me kind of sad.
There was a time not long ago, When life was quite a blast.
Now I fully understand, About 'Living in the Past'.
We used to go to friends' homes, Football games and lunches.
Now we go to therapy, to hospitals, And after-funeral brunches.
We used to have hangovers, From parties that were gay.
Now we suffer body aches, And sleep the night away.
We used to go out dining, And couldn't get our fill.
Now we ask for doggie bags, Come home and take a pill.
We used to often travel, To places near and far.
Now we get backaches, From riding in the car.
Used to go out shopping, For new clothing at the Mall
But, now we never bother... All the sizes are too small.
That, my friend is how life is, And now my tale is told.
So, enjoy each day and live it up...
Before you're too darn old!
You pass this way only once so enjoy it while you can, Live Laugh and Love !!
Horsback Riding
A blonde named Anna had a near death experience. The other day when she went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. She tried with all her might to hang on, but was thrown off.
Just when things could not possibly get worse, her foot got caught in the stirrup. When this happened, she fell head first to the ground. Her head continued to bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down.
Just as she was giving up hope and losing consciousness, the Wal-Mart manager happened to walk by and unplug it.
Porsche For Sale
A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye: $500 Porsche! New! The man thought that it was very unusual to sell a Porsche for $500, and he thought it might be a joke, but thought it was worth a shot. So he went to the lady's house and sure enough, she had an almost brand new Porsche.
"Wow!" the man said. "Can I take it for a test drive?" Unlike what he expected, the man found that the car ran perfectly and took it back to the lady's house.
"Why are you selling me this great Porsche for only $500?"
"My husband just ran off with his secretary, and he told me I could have the house and the furniture as long as I sold his Porsche and sent him the money."
Stranded On A Desert Island
A blonde, a brunette and a readhead are stuck on an island. For years and years they live there, until one day they find a magic lamp. They rub and rub and sure enough out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one."
The brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life-- I just want to go home" ... POOF she is gone.
The redhead makes her wish "This place sucks, I want to go home too" ... POOF she is gone.
The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie says to her "My dear what is the matter, "I wish my friends were here" ... POOF!!!
FISHERMAN
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish.
must have own boat with motor. Please send photograph of motorboat.
SALESMAN
Once in a lifetime offer, to get yourself the original, genuine article. One of the most handsome and smartest bachelor's around is now looking for a wife.
MATHEMATICIAN
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must be numerate and understand complex algebraic logarithms. Needed to help further my family unit.
IT CONSULTANT
Well there is definite room for improvement in my life. The speed of my current flows of information and processes is slowing down and the injection of a wife into my life is bound to improve efficiency. Compatibility could be an issue.
CAR DEALER
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.
PILOT
Wife required to complete my life. Please only level headed applicants. She must not have her heads in the clouds, but have her feet firmly on the ground. Her heart must be in it for the long haul. And she absolutely must also be aerodynamically sound!!!
BANKER
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
ACCOUNTANT
Required a girl with a good head for figures. She must be averse to making unnecessary expenditure and her very nature should be one of generating as few expenses in my life as possible.
BEGGAR
Allah kay naam peh koi eik biwi dey dey, Doosrey kee nahi to upni hee dey dey, Allah terah bullah kurrey, Tujhey eik key balley doh dey dey, Hillery hogi toh Monika bhi dey dey!
DOCTOR
I am looking for a wife to cure the emptiness in my life. However if you feel the need for a second opinion then its fine by me.
ARMY COMMANDO
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife. Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife and a compass. She who dares wins. Camouflage provided.
ASTRONAUT
I'm searching for a wife to fill the space in my life. Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are out of this world!
When maths teacher writes love letter !!
My Dear SweetHeart,
Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane.
There I saw you with our cute circular face,conical nose and spherical eyes,standing in your triangular garden.
Before seeing you my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.
My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me.
The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity.
I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity.
You are as essential to me as an element to a set.
The geometry of my life revolves around your acute personality.
My love, if you do not meet me at parabola restaurant on date 10 at sunset, when the sun is making an angle of 160 degrees, my heart would be like a solved polynomial of degree 10.
With love from your higher order derivatives of maxima and minima, of an unknown function.
A 5 yr old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. While playing with his toys in her bedroom while Grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?
Grandma replied, Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long.
The TV evangelists keep me company and make me feel so good. The comedies make me laugh. I'm really happy with the TV as my boyfriend.
Grandma turned on the TV and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she finally started hitting the backside of the TV, hoping to fix the problem.
The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door, and there stood a man.
The man said, Hello, son, is your grandma home?
The little boy replied, Yeah, but she is in the bedroom banging her boyfriend.
Grandma's minister fainted!!
Santa and Banta decide to apply for jobs at a mine that had opened nearby. After sitting in the waiting room for a while, Banta gets called in for his interview.
The boss asks Banta if he had worked underground mines before? Banta says that he had.
The boss asks him how deep under ground he worked?
Banta says, "Oh, about 8 to 10 feet."
The boss says, "Mines are a lot deeper than that, get out of here - you're no miner!"
On his way out, Banta tells Santa to tell the boss that he worked real deep underground so he could get the job. Santa gets called in.
The boss asks Santa if he had worked underground mines before?
Santa says, "Oh sure."
The boss asks how deep underground he worked.
Santa says, "I used to work in a mine 20,000 feet underground. "
The boss says, "20,000 feet, Wow! That is incredible!, "What kind of lights did you use in a mine so deep underground? "
Santa says, "Oh, I didn't need a light, I worked on the day shift!"
Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
Man who run in front of car get tyred.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.
War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
QUIZ
1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get cat gut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
8) What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert
8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange
Peter called his doctor's office for an appointment.
"I'm sorry," said the receptionist, "we can't fit you in for at least two weeks."
"But I could be dead by then!"
"No problem. If your wife lets us know, we'll cancel the appointment. "
Patient: Nurse, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.
Nurse: Have you seen a doctor?
Patient: No, just spots.
Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery:
Oops!
Has anyone seen my watch?
That was some party last night. I can't remember when I've been that drunk.
Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
Well this book doesn't say that... What edition is your manual?
OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
Come back with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that...uh... that uh.....thingy
If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.
Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Damn, there go the lights again...
Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
Steril, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?
What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change!
What do you mean, he's not insured?
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce"!
I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.
Let's hurry, I don't want to miss "Bay Watch"
That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?
Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving.
Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?
Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
This is really a hilarious one ....
During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile,
Soviet satellites
would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 5 seconds Soviet counter-missiles would be on their way.
This was their scenario.................
But if there is a nuclear war between India and Pakistan.
The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India.
They don't need any permission from their government, and promptly order the countdowns.
Indian technology is highly advanced.
In less than 8 seconds, Indian army detects the Pak Countdown and decides to launch a missile in retribution.
But they need permission from the Government of India.
They submit their request to the Indian President. The President forwards it to the Cabinet.
The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok Sabha session. The LS meets, but due to several walkouts and severe protests by the opposition, it gets
adjourned and adjourned indefinitely.
The President asks for a quick decision.
In the mean time, the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical failure. Their attempts for a relaunch are still on.
Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a party that was giving outside support withdraws it.
The President asks the PM to prove his majority within a week.
As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote, a caretaker government is installed.
The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear missile.
But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government can not take such a decision because elections are at hand.
A Public Interest Litigation is filed in the Supreme Court alleging misuse of power by the Election Commission.
The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM, and says the acting PM is authorized to take this decision in view of the emergency facing the nation.
Just then one of the Pak missiles successfully took off, but it fell 367 miles away from the target, on its own government building at 11.00AM.
Fortunately there were no casualties as no employee had reached the office that early.
In any case, the nuclear core of the missile had detached somewhere in flight.
The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China and USA.
The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a nuclear missile of its own, after convening an all-party meeting.
This time all the parties agree.
Its three months since the army had sought permission. But as preparations begin, "pro-humanity", "anti-nuclear" activists come out against the Government's decision.
Human chains are formed and Rasta rokos organised.
In California and Washington endless e-mails are sent to Indians condemning the government and mentioning "Please forward it to as many Indians as possible".
On the Pakistan side, the missiles kept malfunctioning. Some missiles deviate from target due to technical failures or high-speed wind blowing over Rajasthan.
Many of them land in the Indian Ocean killing some fishes.
A missile (smuggled from USA) is pressed into service.
Since the Pakistan army is unable to understand its software, it hits its original destination:
Russia.
Russia successfully intercepts the missile and in retaliation launches a nuclear missile towards Islamabad.
The missile hits the target and creates havoc.
Pakistan cries for help. India expresses deep regrets for what has happened and sends in a million dollars worth of Parle-G biscuits.
Thus India never gets to launch the missile. Pakistan never gets it right
And
we live happily ever after!!
"God Please Save my Nation from My Own People "
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